20 Foods to Eat When You're So Over NYE

By Pie Squared
Created February 23, 2017
20 Foods to Eat When You're So Over NYE
We’re offering up recipes for every last last second of 2014. So roll up your apron sleeves, funseekers. It’s going to be a wild ride. MORE+ LESS-

That great big ball in the middle of Times Square is getting ready for its annual fall.

That’s kind of an analogy for how the typical New Year’s Eve seems to go. Starting with the highest expectations, it’s the night that’s most ripe for a quick trip into hecksville. Fortunately, we’re offering up recipes for every last last second of 2014. So roll up your apron sleeves, funseekers. It’s going to be a wild ride.


Phase 1: Ready, set, rock-and-roll. Whip these up to get the party started with delicious cocktails and delectable desserts. Because that’s what’s for dinner, right?


1. Marshmallow Cake-tini Cocktail

Fuel up for a long night of looking fabulous amongst the beautiful people. Kicking it off: luscious cake-flavored vodka.


2. Pink Champagne Buttercream Cookie Cups

For-real champagne in for-goodness-sake sugar cookie cups. Now that’s a toast-worthy achievement, topped with teeny sugary “bubbles”. Cheers, everyone!


3. Chocolate Truffles

Make sure you point your pinkie out when you eat these decadent confections, dedicated to take any sting out of saying goodbye to 2014.


4. Hibiscus Royale Champagne Cocktail

The French stir a spoonful of simple syrup into champagne to toast special occasions. And what’s more special than looking forward to the Ultimate Night Ahead? December 31, here you come.


5. Pink Champagne Cupcakes

Don’t waste valuable stomach space on non-celebratory foods. Fresh fruit? Save that for the New Year’s Resolutions – tonight is about excess. As in the excessive bliss of biting into a delicious champagne treat.


Phase 2: You’re dressed, you’re pumped, and you’re hungry. And when it’s the last meal of the year, you’re gonna do it up right. Bring on the maitre d’ – or just save a bundle and go gourmet yourself.


1. Lobster Mac and Cheese

A comfort food favorite meets the world’s most indulgent meal. This is how the rich and famous get their carbs on. Why should you do with anything less?


2. Garlic and Thyme Grilled Sirloin

And to go with your surf, some darn fine turf. Herbs and a little hit of steak sauce means you’ll love it tender, love it true.


3. Pan-Seared Parmesan Scallops

Make a huge batch to serve as party appetizers, serve a few on top of pasta or polenta, or just treat yourself to eating one luscious herbed scallop after another. Yes, with your fingers.


4. Dark Chocolate Fondue

Mistletoe’s got nothing on fanning a romantic flame compared to two people feeding each other chunks of chocolate-dripped decadence. Just sayin’.


5. Crescent-Wrapped Brie

The Brie says that you know your cheeses. The flaky baked crust says you know your delicious. The fact that you’re feeding all your friends says you’ve got a seriously fun night ahead.


Phase 3: The Mid-Evening Crossroads

One of two paths will reveal themselves soon: The path that leads to a night you’ll never forget (assuming you remember anything), or the journey that’s a one-way ticket to I Hate Myselfville. Fortunately, these dishes take you in either direction, equally deliciously.


1. Magic 8 Ball Cakes

What will 2015 hold? Only the 8 Ball knows for sure. We predict good fortune and true love in the New Year... or at least a delicious bite of cake to distract you in the meantime.


2. Black and White Cheesecake Clock

No matter how you slice it, it’s a creamy, luscious, so-good, no-bake way to say “There’s nobody else I’d rather while away the waning hours of December with”. Even if you’re pretty much saying it to yourself.


3. Sparkly White Chocolate Mousse for New Year’s Eve

Spoonful after spoonful of melty made-by-you white chocolate, whipped within an inch of its life and dusted with (edible) glittery fairy dust so all your deepest wishes will come true at midnight. Yep, totally happening.


4. French 75 Cocktail

Straight-up bubbly is fine, but when you’ve got the whole rest of the year left (all 90ish minutes or whatevs), you gotta mix things up. Like citrus liqueur turning champagne into a magical potion of awesomeness.


5. Bramble Jelly Shots

Jello shots? Please. It’s NYT, for crying in your noisemaker, so up your game and craft these artisan jelly shots with fresh lemon, berry liqueur and a haute-stuff attitude.


Phase 4: Midnight has passed, and it was less mahvelous, more meh. That hottie you sidled up to for the stroke-of-midnight kiss... didn’t. You spilled your glass of champagne halfway through the toast. All your acquaintances paired up and guess who’s the odd one out? And... let’s just eat all the things already.


1. Bacon Chocolate Couch Potato Bars

Any one of the ingredients is a survival tool in itself. But mashed up into awesome bars that deliver pretzels, bacon, chips, chocolate, peanut butter, and caramel into your mouth ALL AT ONCE? Suck it, NYE. We’ve found something better.


2. Copycat Bacon-Taco Crunchy Wrap

First you fry the bacon. Then you fry the rest of the stuff in the bacon fat. Then you roll it all up in a neat little package. Which you then fry in the remaining bacon fat. There’s a theme going here...


3. Copycat Quesarito

No drive-through necessary. Just all the cheesy goodness of a quesadilla, rolled around the luscious fillings of a burrito. Being a two-timer like that makes everything all better, doesn’t it?


4. Spam-Filled Fried Donuts

This is the after-midnight feed-your-face feast that separates the amateurs from the hard-core, the New Year’s Eve wannabes from They Who Rock 2015. Cubes of spam. Donuts. Go.


5. Rainbow Sprinkles Donut Pie

What if you weren’t slowed down by having to eat donut holes one at a time? And could eat them, oh, I don’t know, by the forkful? And then there was a glaze on them? And it was all warm and comforting because they got baked into an actual pie crust? This is your pie. This is your time. Happy 2015!